Reasons why Buffy the Vampire Slayer is educational

When Reuters ran this piece which quotes this USA Today story:

Asked Wednesday whether the program could be considered dead, Ridge jokingly gestured as if he were driving a stake through its heart and said, "Yes."

If they were familiar with Buffy, then they wouldn't have misread it like this

Asked whether the program could be considered dead, Ridge jokingly gestured as if he were driving a stake through its head and said: "Yes," USA Today reported.

Have you ever tried to drive a stake through someone's head? It's downright tedious. Besides, we don't need to have a spreadsheet calculating the odds that non-Enlgish surnames mean you are terrorist or mild mannered writer. We can just take the next logical step from our friends in Japan and insert tracking chips in all our law-abiding, America-loving, freedom-contemplating skulls. It's certainly less painful than a stake.